Thursday, November 7, 2013
100 word Challenge (Week 10)
I woke up early in the morning and lay in bed thinking about the fishing
trip I was going on. When I was ready I scampered into the passenger seat next
to dad and we drove to the wharf. When we arrived I started carrying the equipment
to the end of the wharf. Dad helped me cast my line and immediately I got a big bite, My line started
shaking and the fish edged me closer to the water then SPLASH I fell into the sea head first, Dad had to haul me out of the
sea. I was drenched!
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Hi Emily, well done for entering the 100WC this week.
ReplyDeleteYou have used the prompt as the focus of your writing and you have a clear beginning, middle and end.
You have used a range of connectives to show movement of time.
Maybe next time, try to use some more description of the action in your writing to build a picture for your readers.
Well done and keep writing. :)
Thank you for your feedback I will take that into mind when I write my next story.
DeleteThank you
Emily